Thursday, July 23, 2015

The Bakerbarian and Goblin Marine

Here's some weirder and sillier class options, statted up for 5th edition dnd!

The Bakerbarian
Inspiration for the Bakerbarian here.

You are a cook who has such dedication to your art that you can weaponize the foods you create. You can infuse it with your intense emotions and power, churn out innumerable amounts of bread missiles, or create armor from food. You cook bread and cakes angrily.
Class: Barbarian

Bonus Proficiencies
When you choose to become a Bakerbarian at level 3, you become proficient in cook's utensils.

Weaponized Foodstuffs
When you choose to learn the arts of the Bakerbarian at level 3, you can create deadly weapons seemingly out of thin air if you are carrying food (alternatively, if you are carrying the ingredients and cook's utensils, and take a few moments to make it). This functions as a ritual spell, essentially. These weapons typically deal 1d6 damage, but they can deal more or less damage if you use fewer materials or take less time. You are considered proficient with all of the edible weapons you create, and if it is a weapon you are actually proficient in, your proficiency bonus is doubled.

Right Out of The Oven
Beginning at level 6, you can imbue your attacks with a different damage type (typically fire). It will deal the same amount of damage, but will bypass resistances and immunities to the prior damage type if present in the creature being attacked, and will take advantage of vulnerabilities. The weapon will change to reflect the damage type, such as becoming burning hot if right out of the oven, or blue like ice in right out of the fridge. Your attacks cannot deal force, psychic, or thunder damage.

Loafs of Anger
You can create weaponized foodstuffs as normal. However (beginning at level 10), if you create them while enraged, they become intelligent creatures that serve you. They will last as long as you stay angry, either actually still in a state of enragement, or just normally angry. If they were created while experiencing any other intense emotion, then they will not be very violent. They have one attack that deals an amount of damage that is equal to the amount you allocated to creating them as weapons. In all other respects, they are like a beast or other monster of CR 1 or less. These creatures can only move to around 120 feet away from you before they become just food again.

Improved Foodstuffs
Beginning at level 14, you can create all weaponized foodstuffs almost at-will, with only the most damaging types requiring more time. You are also able to instill magic in your food, being able to place a wizard spell in it as if you were a wizard of a level 10 levels below yours (beginning at level 4). You can create a number of spell-cakes equivalent to the number of spells a wizard of that level can cast in a day, but they are only activated when they are eaten. You can add either your Wisdom or Constitution modifiers to the number of spell-cakes you can make in a day. The spell save DC is equal to 8+proficiency bonus of wizard level for purposes of spell-cake crafting+the higher of your Wisdom and Constitution modifiers.

The Goblin Marine
Inspiration for the Goblin Marine here.
You are someone trained in the skills used by goblins, orcs, ogres, and their gross kind during fighting. You could actually be a goblin or some similar creature, or you could be someone trained in them to be adept in avoiding them.
Class: Fighter

Improved Bites and Claws
When you select this class option at level 3, you have sharpened your teeth and your claws so that they became better weapons. They deal 1d4 damage at first, and then increase the damage die as a monk of a level equal to yours increases their unarmed damage.

Stench Warfare
Beginning at level 7, you are able to create great clouds of vile odor from your own unwashed body, or from the complex mixture of smelly chemicals. You can exude a cloud of gross gas that spreads up to 30 feet, and then dissipates. If anything is in the cloud, they must make a Constitution save against your save DC (8+proficiency bonus+Constitution modifier). If they fail the save, they are knocked unconscious by the stench for 1 minute. The time that they are unconscious for increases by 1/4 minute every level.

Crawl on Walls
Beginning at 10th level, you can crawl up seemingly smooth walls at a speed equal to half your walking speed. At level 14, this becomes a speed equal to your walking speed. You can climb just as you can do normal movement during your turn in combat.

Bugbearricade
Beginning at 15th level, you have trained yourself to be so agile so as to be able to hide behind creatures of even your size or one size smaller. This counts as cover, just as hiding behind a larger ally or barricade would.

Disgusting Alchemy
At 18th level, you can create vile grenades and bombs from the fluids, juices, and tissues from your body or the bodies of others. The effect of this bomb varies, based on the ingredients used, but it will function as some sort of spell from the wizard spell list that can be cast by an Eldritch Knight of a level 9 levels below yours. You can create as many of these as you wish, but if you create more than is allowed (see the Eldritch Knight spell matrix for how many you can create), you risk hurting yourself or your teammates.


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